Blog

When Talking About Racism You’re Not Required to Change Anyone’s Mind

Posted on by Clay Rivers
Photo by Sushobhan Badhai at Unsplash.com

Racism. The subject is steeped in centuries of emotion. The mere mention of it among people of different ethnicities has the ability to suck all the fun out of a room faster than a backdraft consumes air, and more often than not, the resulting vibe after such discussions is just as combustible. There are those who are exhausted from explaining it and those who are tired of hearing about it. In all honesty, I don’t enjoy writing about the subject. But … as a Person of Color, there’s one reason I continue to have those discussions — and if you consider yourself an ally of People of Color who stands against racist practices it’s the same reason why you should continue to as well: I have those discussions because they matter.

Sometimes You Eat the Bear, Sometimes the Bear Eats You

Posted on by Clay Rivers
Photo by aaron clinard on Unsplash

Difficult people are hard to love. This makes having healthy relationships with them challenging. Read as: a pain the ass, thorn in the side, fun as a sharp stick in the eye, or all of the above. Everyone has at least one difficult relationship. And probably the most challenging relationship is the one between parents and their adult children.

Depending on How You See a Thing

Posted on by Clay Rivers
The Helix Nebula, news.nationalgeographic.com

New Year’s Resolutions, 2017, and Beyond

I don’t do resolutions. I gave up the practice a long time ago. Maybe it’s just me, but by the time February rolls around, I’m too consumed with surviving the public shame of not having a proper Valentine to remember a promise to improve some aspect of my behavior that I made after three glasses of champagne on New Year’s Eve. I can’t recall exactly when I tossed the promise to lose weight long. It doesn’t really matter as I’ve kinda become accustomed to my new cherub-bod. It’s growing on me. Literally.

God Rest You Merry, Gentlemen

Posted on by Clay Rivers

December 24, 2004

I sat alone in my room at the Doubletree hotel in Boston and ended a phone call with my family in Orlando. I summoned as much cheer as possible from my aching body to wish them a merry Christmas Eve. I didn’t fool them at all.

I Said, “Happy Holidays!”

Posted on by Clay Rivers
Aaron Burden, Unsplash.com

Some people get all bent out of shape by use of the phrase “happy holidays.” I suppose it’s because they prefer others greeted them exclusive with the phrase “merry Christmas” this time of year or not at all. Personally, it makes me happy when people wish me good tidings of great joy (or any amount, for that matter).

A Tale of Two Turkeys

Posted on by Clay Rivers
https://pixabay.com/photo-218742/

It Was the Best of Times, It Was the Worst of Times

NEVER utter the words, “This will be the best [insert any holiday or event] ever.” The second the sentence leaves your lips, you have implored all malevolent forces in the Universe to conspire against you and bring about your complete and utter humiliation. Your recourse? Abject weeping and gnashing your teeth. But thank God for provision.

Your Life as Your Platform: Use It or Lose It

Posted on by Clay Rivers
Image by Kane Reinholdtsen, unsplash.com

If you don’t take a stand for who you are, what you believe, and share the validity of your experiences, someone else will write a narrative for you that most certainly will not be in your best interest. This post is all about platform.

Christmas Is: Mischief and Merriment in Manhattan

Posted on by Clay Rivers
Available in print and for Kindle at Amazon, and also for Nook, iPad, and Roku.

I’m thrilled to announce my new book, Christmas Is: Mischief and Merriment in Manhattan (Constant Rose Publishing, 2017). My fourth book and first foray into fiction is a comedic, madcap love letter to New York, its inhabitants, and the city’s holiday traditions. The story drops the reader in the middle of the Big Apple just as the Christmas season kicks off and carries him/her on to Christmas Day.

You Can’t Have Your Privilege and Equal Rights, Too

Posted on by Clay Rivers
Chinh le Duc, unsplash.com

My parents and grandparents used to wield an old maxim when I was a kid: you can’t have your cake and eat it, too. I vaguely understood its meaning as: you can’t everything you want. If I had a cake—a slice, a cupcake, or an entire cake—of course I’d eat it, and that would be the end of that. What needed to be discussed? Ah, the sweetness of youth.

The “Official” Crib Notes to Understanding the Minority Experience

Posted on by Clay Rivers
Image by Michael Kristenson, unsplash.com

Prep

The parallels between understanding matters of race and taking an exam with a pass/fail grading curve are similiar. A bit extreme, but similar. It’s easy to say “you either get it or you don’t.” Granted there’s a whole lot more to it than that, but roll with me on that analogy.

Before we get to the answers, you have understand that given some people’s racial experiences, they’re response of “I’m tired of having to educate white people about my feelings …” is more than a little justified. It is a wholly valid response. I say that not to be dismissive, but we don’t ask a rape victim to recount the experience of having been raped or spell out the emotional horror that follows such an experience simply because we want to know. It’s just not done. Understand, I’m not throwing cold water on anyone’s desire to understand the experience of People of Color, but at its core the experience is human and more relatable then one might first imagine. I say that because, well … People of Color are human just as white people are human.